Neurodivergent-affirming therapy in Denver, Colorado
Lily Duffy, LCSW, AuDHD
For neurodivergent adults who want to find peace & heal from chronic shame and self-criticism
Does this sound familiar?
You feel worn down by self-criticism, shame, and a pervasive sense of being both too much AND not enough
You have a tendency to second-guess and doubt yourself, which leaves you feeling exhausted and powerless
You’re prone to overthinking and overanalyzing, leading you to feel depleted and numb (yet somehow still anxious)
You get overwhelmed often, leading to shame spirals where you criticize yourself for being “too sensitive”
Your body’s baseline hovers steadily at the intersection of chronically exhausted and chronically restless
You have a vivid imagination and inner world, but it can feel safer to live in your fantasies than to be present with yourself
You have a strong moral compass—justice, fairness, equality, equity, and truth are highly important to you
You often feel lonely and misunderstood, like an outsider who doesn’t belong. Even in close relationships, it can feel hard to show up as your full, authentic self
You find yourself people-pleasing and avoiding conflict, leaving your own needs chronically unmet. You may have relationships that feel toxic, shallow, one-sided, or unfulfilling
From the outside it looks like you’ve got it together, but on the inside you’re crumbling
You’re exhausted from masking at work, school, the grocery store, in your relationships, etc., and it often doesn’t feel safe for you to unmask
You feel embarrassed and ashamed of your problems—you tell yourself you should have them figured out by now
You long to feel more connected to yourself and others, even if parts of you feel afraid
You may identify as sensory neurodivergent (Autistic, ADHD, AuDHD, Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), Gifted, 2e/Twice Exceptional, PDA, etc.), or you might be considering/wondering whether you’re neurodivergent
You may have been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder or another personality disorder in the past, but you’ve questioned whether this diagnosis is accurate, as it seems to miss important elements of who you are and how you experience the world
You’ve felt misunderstood, invalidated, or dismissed by other therapists or providers you’ve worked with
You desperately want to trust and accept yourself, but it feels dangerous (and maybe even impossible)
You’re overwhelmed and exhausted from living this way
Like you, my clients are sensitive, creative, intelligent, self-aware, and empathic folks who work hard to show up well in all areas of their lives. But the toll it takes is getting to be too much. When clients first come to see me, they often feel like their own worst enemy, constantly doubting and criticizing themselves. No matter how hard they work or how much they accomplish, it never feels like enough. They often feel deeply exhausted or burnt out and may notice an increase in sensitivity or irritability, numbness, trouble remembering and thinking clearly, or a reduced ability to complete basic self-care and/or daily tasks.
Deep down, they know that no amount of outward success or approval from others will make them feel whole and worthy, but they have a hard time imagining what could help them to get there. Despite their self-awareness, my clients also feel an inner disconnect, as if there are parts of themselves they don’t fully know or understand. They long to feel more connected, but they also fear what might be uncovered if they explore those parts more deeply. Some also come to therapy with a sense that past experiences and relationships are impacting them in the present, leading to feelings of being broken, defective, on-edge, alone, bad, or unlovable.
More than anything, my clients want to trust themselves, feel more confident and less overwhelmed, and build a life that feels meaningful, sustainable, and doesn’t lead to constant burnout.
Hi, I’m Lily, an AuDHD therapist in Colorado. I help high masking and late-identified* neurodivergent adults finally trust and befriend themselves, and design lives they don’t have to recover from
One of the most painful aspects of living with constant self-doubt and criticism is the sense of loneliness and isolation it can bring—I know because I’ve been there myself. As a high masking, late-identified AuDHDer, I spent the first 30 years of my life feeling wrong, bad, defective, misunderstood, but not fully knowing why—all while desperately trying to hide my shame and the depth of my struggles from other people. I know how draining and impossible to sustain life becomes after years of constant masking, how terrifying it can feel when you start to reach burnout, and the relief and grief that follows when it finally clicks into place that perhaps you’ve actually been autistic, ADHD, AuDHD, highly sensitive, or gifted all along.
As someone who’s walked my own healing journey from the shame, complex trauma, and internalized ableism that neurodivergent people inherit from living in this culture, I know firsthand that finding the right support can make all the difference as we work through it. If you’re feeling ready to transform your relationship to yourself, others, and the world—and build a life that actually nourishes and sustains you—I’d be honored to help you get there.
*Yes, self-diagnosis/identification is just as valid as a professional diagnosis!
How would your life shift if you learned to give yourself the care and compassion you need?
In our work together, I’ll help you:
Heal your relationship with your inner critic so you no longer feel beaten down and exhausted
Unburden the shame you’ve been saddled with as neurodivergent human trying to survive in a world that wasn’t built for you
Unearth deeply-rooted self-trust and confidence that can’t be taken away (spoiler: it’s actually been there all along, but parts of you cut off access to it when they learned that trusting yourself wasn’t safe)
Get to know and befriend different parts of yourself, become more connected to your intuition and discernment
Effectively tend to yourself when you're triggered, in pain, or caught in a pattern that isn’t working/doesn’t feel good
Ask for what you want and need, set boundaries with others, find caring and supportive friends who are safe to unmask with
Transform your relationship to masking so you’re not constantly depleted or stuck in burnout
Feel more rooted and grounded in yourself, learn to embrace your sensitivity and unique neurotype
Build a life that honors and accommodates your neurodivergence, reduces overwhelm, & allows you to funnel your limited time and energy into the things that matter most to you (rather than the things that society tells you should matter)
Services
Neurodivergent-affirming therapy
Support that honors your lived experience, needs, struggles, and biggest dreams as an autistic, ADHD, AuDHD, gifted, or 2e/Twice Exceptional human—with an AuDHD therapist who gets it.
Internal Family Systems (IFS)
Compassionate parts-work that helps you meet the different voices, patterns, and needs inside you with curiosity instead of criticism, creating lasting change.
Somatic therapy
Body-based attunement to help you notice what’s happening beneath thoughts and language, addressing chronic nervous system dysregulation at the root.
Online therapy in Colorado
Telehealth for adults statewide—spacious, flexible, and accessible from wherever you are.